In the next few days, observe what politeness linguistic resources people use around you. Describe them (use the actual language in which they actually happened to illustrate) with appropriate vocabulary using one of the views of politeness (specify which one you are using).
Read the entries of at least two classmates and leave comments on their polite/impolite situations and how you would classify/describe them.
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Last Saturday, my aunt Isabel had a party with old friends from high school, so she asked me if I could watch my two cousins that night. She knew that I had to study, so she already felt guilty before making the request. She told me something like:
ReplyDelete"Hey, honey! I had noticed how long your hair is by now! I have not paid attention to it for months! So...are you going to leave it red for much longer or are you waiting for it to grow your colour? It is beautiful both ways. How are you doing about studies? Sure fine. And boyfriends? By the way,I came here to ask you for a little, stupid favour, which I am sure you will have no problems with. Did I ever talk to you about Ceci and Miguel? Someday I will introduce you to them, they think you looked lovely when you were a child! I have shown some photographs to them. You certainly were lovely. Anyway, they happen to organize a sort of party tonight and I am affraid they are waiting for me to come. They would be really disappointed if I refused their invitation. The point is: I don't know what to do with your cousins...I know, I know you have to study, and if your answer is NO,I will totally understand."
She was using a large amount of negative politeness to minimize the impoliteness which is always part of a request, but she knew I was going to say YES.
(according to Leech's view)
ReplyDeletea ver si puede ser...
ReplyDeleteIn my family, Saturday is the sort of "cleaning day" of the week, and there are always many things to do in the house (and outside of it). Last Saturday morning, my father was cutting the grass while my brother Julio -who is 15- and I were having breakfast in the kitchen. Sweating a little, my father came into the kitchen and said to Julio: "¡Buenos días! Qué, lo pasaste bien anoche con tus amigos, ¿eh? Me alegro, aunque te quedaste hasta muy tarde, ¿no? Que tuve que ir a recogerte a la 1:30... Bueno, estoy afuera. Y, por cierto, por la entrada hay tela de hierba sin quitar..." , and my brother asked: "Vale, ahora voy".
ReplyDeleteBefore making the actual request –“cut the grass, Julio”- my father used negative politeness to minimize the impoliteness of the impolite illocution, which is the request itself, and since the task would definitely cause an effort for the hearer – in this case, my brother- and was not for his benefit , we could also say that the speaker –my father- was breaking the Tact Maxim, at least: “Minimize hearer costs; maximize hearer benefit”, giving his son (with whom he obviously maintains a very close social distance, using Leech’s words) no options but to cut the grass, knowing beforehand that Julio would do it.
(According to Leech’s view of politeness)
Marta, in our cases,we can say that the Spanish proverb "la confianza da asco" comes true very often, doesn't it? xD Eventhough your aunt tried to be polite when requesting you that, it is clear that what she said was actually impolite since a request is always so, and there is no doubt that she was looking for her own interests, as well. In my opininion, she took advantage of the situation: knowing the close distance that there is between you two(aunt-niece), she flattered you first and then tried to make you have pity on her, and, as you said, she knew you were going to say "yes",for sure, otherwise you would lose face with your aunt...
ReplyDeleteThey always take advantage of the goodies...
Last Thursday, when I left the University some people was doing a survey in the entrance. The day before, I had done the survey with a collaborator. On Thursday, another collaborator saw me. Before she asked me if I could do the survey I said her: "Lo siento pero yo ya he realizado la encuesta con otro compañero tuyo. Muchas Gracias" In this situation, I was using negative politeness to minimize the impoliteness of impolite illocutions. I said her "...he realizado la encuesta con un compañero tuyo" but I really meant NO.
ReplyDelete(According to Leech's view of Politeness)
Last Sunday, i was with my brother at home waiting for a group of friends to come and have dinner with us. We both are very lazy and did not feel like preparing anything so we sat on the couch to watch T.V for a while. Then my brother checked his watch realising that there was no more time to lose and told me: Quillo, yo tampoco tengo ganas de hacer nada pero tenemos que ir preparando ya lo que sea, ¿Qué te parece si tu cocinas los macarrones con tomate y yo luego me encargo de fregar todos los platos y de recoger la mesa?
ReplyDeleteIn this case, my dear brother used positive politeness since the request is produced for a common goal and the speaker tries to minimize the threat to the hearer´s positive face.
(According to Brown and Levinson´s theory of politeness)
Jose Alberto Breval Palacios
My situation is just something like Nuria's one (maybe it was the same day...=P)but in my case the girl was following me for a while speaking with me so i had no choice but to stop and listen all the "retaila" about this and that. When she stopped talking...I could only said: "Oh, I'm sorry..you know I'm the first one who wants to help with all that but I have no money because I'm not working, etc etc. And the girl's face was like " mmm...i was wasting my time with this...girl"
ReplyDeleteSo,in this case I was using negative politeness, in an attempt to minimize the impoliteness of the impolite illocution.(Leech's Principle of Politeness)
Remember to keep the actual words in Spanish if they happened in Spanish, so that can actually appreciate the meaning, intention, grade of (im)politeness,...
ReplyDeleteMaria Lasowska
ReplyDeleteLast week, while I was studying in the library I observed the following situation: 2 boys (more or less of the same age) who didn’t know each other were sitting in front of me ; boy A was looking at a book that boy B had close to him and the first one finally said pointing at the book: “Me dejas ver el libro un momento?”
Now, analysing it from Lakoff’s point of view I would say that A was polite. According to her 2 rules of pragmatic competence, meaning: be clear and be polite, A obeyed both of them. He was clear, direct ( even pointing at the book),and his request did create any ambiguity.To say definitely whether A was polite or not we have to have a look at 3 subrules that Lakoff posits.It is to say: A was not imposing (it was a polite request, no sign of ordering the other), A gave B options ( B could have easily said "NO" to A's request), the third rule which is about making the other feel good - I would say that it does not apply here as Lakoff states that it is used when intimate politeness is required, which I think was not the case here, as the boys didn't know each other.
If one analysed Irene's (im)polite situation from other linguist's (for example Lakoff's) point of view, s/he would say that Irene's father was actually not polite.First, he was not clear about what he really wanted from her brother and secondly, he didn't leave any options and did impose.
ReplyDeleteNuria you were super polite. I don't think that many people answer those interviewers the way you did. Nice example to follow.
This one is pretty similar to the examples by Nuria and Vicky, but it's kind of funny and I remembered this exercise right away, so I'm going to post it anyway. I was walking by calle Sierpes when I saw some guys with notebooks asking you to joing some organization, but I didn't feel like stoping. So I thought since a lot of people tend to think I am not spanish (because of my hair and my height, I supose xD) I could get out of that one without saying just "no". So when he said "Perdona, ¿tienes un minuto?" I anwsered "I'm sorry, I don't speak spanish". So the boy just smiled at me and gave me an ok sing with his hand. Of course, I could not help laughing the moment I past him.
ReplyDeleteIn that situation I used negative politeness, in order to minimize the impoliteness of the situation, according to Leech's Principle of Politeness.
Juancho!! qué poca vergüenza, hombre! shame on you, man! ( But I can't stop laughing... xDDD)
ReplyDeleteDefinitely, after reading your comments,Nuria's, Vicky's and Juancho's, I feel even more pity for those poor guys who ask for people's collaboration at the street (although I have to recognized that I rarely stop and listen to them, either, because I know that my "super salary" is not going to be enough to help their cause/proyect...) Yes, I know, I am impolite, as well, and I know that I lose face when I do that (according to B&L), but I have had bad experiences with questionnaires at the street and things like that and I don't want to go through that situation again, sorry...
I was in the library and I went to the computers to look for a reference. Those computers have a priority for looking up references. There was a girl using the computer to navigate. I asked her:
ReplyDeleteExcuse me, are you almost finished?
She told me, “No, I´ll finish in a moment”.
“Ok, thanks”, I told her, “it is just to look for one reference, you could use the computer afterwards”.
I tried not to be rude by giving options to her and I tried not to impose according to Lakoff view. I was very clear telling her in the second utterance that I needed the computer but with a degree of indirectness without reminding her explicitly that I had preference. But I suppose that both of us knew the fact that these computers are mainly used for search and there is a notice there that explains it.
Some years ago, I took the bus to go to the university and, suddenly, I was involved in a very violent situation:
ReplyDeleteA blind man came in and the girl sitting next to me asked him whether he wanted her seat. Unexpectedly, the man started yelling at her, saying things like these:
- Crees que porque estoy ciego necesito sentarme? Pues te equivocas, quiero estar de pie. Estoy bien de pie. Es mas, estoy harto de que la gente siempre piense que soy un minusvalido por el simple hecho de estar ciego... (bla bla bla)
To tell the truth, I think everyone on the bus was quite surprised by his rude reaction. However, I could see how the girl blushed in less that a second. And by the experession of her face, I knew that she felt really bad and uncomfortable. She even started to cry.
According to Brown & Levinson's theory of politeness, the girl offering her seat lost completely her face. But in my opinion, the blind man also lost it because he could have just answered:'Thanks, but I'm alright', or something alike, instead of blaming the poor girl for the very fact of trying to be polite.
I thought that was not just, because once I experienced a very similar situation but the other way around. I was sitting on the bus because my back hurt so much (and I couldn't hardly walk) when a blind man started yelling at me, saying that I didn't have the right to sit because I was a very young person. Nevertheless, I thought I had definitely more right to sit than him. So I didn't move.
The conclusion I come up with, is that you can never know how an unkown person (or a disable person) will react when confronted to such situations. But I'd rather lose my face for trying to be polite than for being an ungrateful person.
~ Sara Garcia Delgado de Mendoza ~
I was parking my bike in one of the Sevici stations near the university when some random guy asked me: ¿perdona, me das fuego? and I answered: -que va lo siento, no fumo.
ReplyDeleteOf course, the hearer probably didn't want to know if I smoked or not but by answering "que va lo siento, no fumo" (according to Leech's view of politeness) I was using negative politeness to minimize the impoliteness of the impolite illocution, in which I really meant to say 'no'.
At the same time, the random guy also used negative politeness by saying 'perdona' in order to reduce the impoliteness in his impolite request.
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ReplyDeleteSame as you, Irene, I think I am impolite by nature when it comes to someone trying to do a survey or let's say taking my time up in general. After reading Juanchu's comment I have to say that I always do the same thing, although in my case I always say: -"sorry I don't understand your language". But I dont want to imagine what would happen if they say: -"oh, I speak English too!". In this case, I think we would lose face but we could fix it by just saying the classic: -"vale, pero es que tengo prisa"
ReplyDeleteSara, as a response to your comment i would like to say that I always try to do the same thing, I always give up my seat for older/disabled/pregnant people. But, usually, especially older people say "no, it's ok, thanks". Then (following Brown and Levinson's view on politeness) that's when I lose face. So as you say, you never know what their answer will be, but anyway I will keep doing the same thing (except when I have backache lol)because I consider that an act of politeness.
ReplyDeleteThe other day I was talking by phone with my aunt who I didn’t see since several months when she asked to me: So when are you coming to visit me?
ReplyDeleteShe was using positive politeness according to Brown & Levinson since she was requesting me to visit her assuming that I would agree because she appealed to our relationship.